My First Oprah Moment, And I Almost Crapped Myself.

Oh joy.

So, let me tell you about Oprah, she's black, a little plump, and she tells many stories. Happy stories, sad stories, and stupidly silly stories, like the girl in that Astro advertisement says. Well now, you might have watched some of her shows, and thought that those things she talks about would never happen to you. Like the hurricane Katrina incident. Hoo, like we would expect such things right? Sometimes there are stories about pedophiles, older men who are sexual predators to teens or even younger kids. I would think I'm not much of a catch, HaHa, but was I wrong.

It happened last night, it was a Saturday and I was at Sin Liang shopping for groceries with my dad. I just arrived and immediately rushed to the chocolate section. Now, I'm not much of a sweet tooth, much less a chocolate binger, but I'm a sucker for those mint flavoured ones. As I was browsing through, I was looking for the Cadbury chocolate bar with mint bits inside. That was when a middle-aged man came over and started to browse at the same spot I was. He looked very sportish but kind of short. He made eye contact with me and said 'sorry'. I replied with a slightly pissed, 'it's okay'. Then when I started to distance myself from the man, he suddenly asked me what flavour I liked, and that he was so happy that the chocolate bar with the many flavours inside came back. I was thinking to myself, like I f*cking care what you think, stop talking to me. But I just let out a faint 'oh, heh heh...'. Then he asked for my name, and I was dumb-founded. I told him, and he misheard and said, "Jonathan?". I thought to myself again thinking, oh sh*t, this guy is a maniac, so I confirmed him thinking my name was Jonathan. Right then when I thought he coulden't get any more over-friendly, he asked whether I was in Form 4 or 5, and what school I was from.

F*CK !!

Now I was b*tch scared of the freak. Why would you ask a person so much about his/her profile? Especially what school he/she was in. When I stupidly told him, he explained further that his name was Louis and was buying 'rations' for some 'boys' from SMK Lutong. Huh, you might now expect him to be a little gay. Hearing this, I asked him directly if he was a teacher at SMK Lutong, then he staggered and replied with a, 'something like that'. What kind of f*cking answer is that. Then he asked if I wanted him to buy me a bar of chocolate. I immediately said no, and that I don't really like chocolate. And he replied with an, it's fine, I don't mind buying you anything. I just turned away and hoped that he would forget it as I have, and f*cking leave me alone. But no, he called out to me again and said that he would buy me that Cadbury Snack thing. The one with the many flavours. No no no no no. I rejected it and said it's okay. Apparently he doesn't like his gifts to be rejected so he just bought it and passed it to me. Before he walked away to get some more stuff, he took a piece of paper from the cashier and started writing his phone number on it and put it in the plastic bag with the chocolate he bought me.

AUGH !!

He's expecting me to call him?! I don't even know the d*mn guy, much less call him. It was turning very freaky. So then I saw my father at the end of the aisle, and he asked who was it, and I said I didn't know. He wasn't very bothered until he saw that I had a bar of chocolate with me, which was already paid for. He asked if I had bought it, I said no, that weird man did. Then he took it lightly and let it pass. When I was about to walk to the cold drinks area, 'Louis', passed by carrying with him around 10 maggi instant bowl noodles, the big sized ones, and asked was I alone. I said I was with my father, hoping he would get the drift and start distancing himself. But out of sheer stupidity again, I asked if he needed any help with the noodles. After all, he did buy the chocolate earlier on. Then he said it was fine, and a tall and dark black-shirted guy came over to help him with some of it. Then 'Louis' said that the guy was his partner. Now, at the time I thought he meant partner in the 'camp' as in helper. After further thinking, I remembered another meaning for partner, and that it usually applied to gay couples. Hmm, I need to get ready for the St.Joseph PTA Dinner Night. I shall continue at the least by tonight after the dinner or tomorrow afternoon. So keep your pants on. And that's figuratively speaking. You're just as weird as that guy. Sheesh.